Hilarious bit about what happens when students are made to memorize great poetical works and can recite them at will for life, even when drunk and wandering the streets in the dead of night. This post from Fielding at The Guardian makes me regret not keeping up the curious habit of learning poems by heart so one can pull them out at odd times throughout one’s life. My fifth-grade teacher made her students memorize a poem of their choice every week, and then recite the poem on Friday. I loathed every single Friday from September through June in 1985. The vomit wants to come back whenever I see a Shel Silverstein book.

Posted by Alexa Harrington

Students have moaned and complained for decades about cafeteria fare. Shockingly, when Mrs. Obama and the Los Angeles School District massively revamped public school lunches in an effort to decrease obesity in America, the high school teens refused to eat black bean burgers and quinoa and demanded their nachos and strawberry milk back.

It turns out that healthy lunches are all well and good for small-scale sample tastings, but when massively produced for a large high school audience on a daily basis, the ew factor is upped considerably.

Whatever. Teenagers start the day angry. Trying to please them only makes them understand that you are their bitch. Also, they will immediately begin subversive activities, like bringing in Cheetos and Pepsi from the outside to ingest and to sell at a profit to their slower-on-the-uptake peers.

Posted by Alexa Harrington

Tomorrow is the Nov. 5th SAT, which I can guarantee is freaking the crap right out of teenagers across the nation. Poor bastards. When I took the Rite of Passage for American High School Students (standardized tests written by pain-in-the-ass adults whose heads are shoved so far up their exit ramps that they can no longer navigate reality), I must say I had a rather cavalier attitude about the whole thing. Almost twelve years of public school had made me quite the badass standardized test taker; I was unconcerned.

Most students don’t have that attitude. To them I advise chilling the eff out, this is not the end of the world. I promise. Shite of a much higher magnitude will befall you in the course of your lifetime, I can guarantee it. So quit your whining and suck it up, kiddos. You walk right in there with your #2 pencils and kick some standardized ass! Or don’t, and head for your 5th choice school. No biggie.

Need some advice on SATs and ACTs and how they may affect your future matriculation plans? Allen Grove is a font of information about college admissions. Here are four of his bits of wisdom:

Low SAT or ACT Scores? These Colleges Don’t Require the Tests
What ACT Scores Do You Need to Get Into College?
Are My SAT Scores Good Enough?
Low ACT Scores? What Now?

Further Reading (my cranky attitude toward standardized tests in general):

Secret SAT Scores
Colbert’s Wickedly True Take on the SATs
Testing Season Begins
An Excellent Argument for Abolishing the SAT
The Newly Unfabulous SAT
Awesome Parent
The SAT Is Not Good
College Admissions Testing: For and Against
January 23rd SAT Results
Calculating Potential
Kaplan SAT Prep Tools on Facebook

Posted by Alexa Harrington

(image: panic)

The unfortunate phenomenon of elementary-aged girls becoming interested in STEM (Science Technology Engineering Math) subjects, going off to college intending to major in and then pursue a career in one of those fields, and ultimately veering off somewhat sharply into less science-and-math rich majors and careers is common.

Fortunately, it has not gone unnoticed by the chicks who have gone on to work in their dream STEM fields, and several entities have started working to foster girls’ education and career paths in STEM subjects.

Michelle Obama, not a STEM girl herself (what with being a lawyer and all), is all for supporting girls in math and science and gave a little talk about it recently. My favorite bits from the transcript:

And if we’re going to out-innovate and out-educate the rest of the world, then we have to open doors to everyone. We can’t afford to leave anyone out. We need all hands on deck. And that means clearing hurdles for women and girls as they navigate careers in science, technology, engineering and math.

And it starts with lighting the spark for science and math in elementary school and grade school. We talk about this all the time. I know for me, I’m a lawyer because I was bad at these subjects. (Laughter.) All lawyers in the room, you know it’s true. We can’t add and subtract, so we argue. (Laughter.)

And so encouraging girls early not to lose heart in those fields, and encouraging them through high school is important. But it also means making sure that these young women can keep pursuing their dreams in college and beyond.

Further Reading:

Why So Few Women In Science, Technology, Engineering and Math?
Dual Academic Careers
First Lady Michelle Obama Speaks to the Dept. of Education

Posted by Alexa Harrington

They always make you take history in school. I’m more of a math and science girl and will always choose a good chemistry lab over a history lecture. However, having been expected to complete several history courses (for the well-rounding of me and my education), I did pick up on the patterns we humans cycle through as decades and centuries go past. The technology we create for ourselves, ostensibly to make our lives easier/better/faster, seems always to impact more than just the job it was created for. I’m talking about wheels and looms, satellites and cotton gins, not Silly Putty and Flowbees.

Dean Shareski over at Ideas and Thoughts wrote a piece about technology in education and whether or not its just a tool. We’re in the midst of that changing moment, the one some hardcore science geek college girl will have to learn about a few centuries hence.

Further Reading:

Literacy: We’ve Still Got It
Another New and Exciting Way to Be Driven Over the Edge by Technology
New Essay Writing Apps for the iPhone and iPod Touch
Implementing Different Tools
Launching the Emerging Media Major
“Don’t Teach Your Kids This Stuff. Please?”
The Future of Education
Digitizing Knowledge
21st Century Learners

Posted by Alexa Harrington

(technology)

The question thousands of high school and college students want to know the answer to: Does Marijuana Make You Stupid? Jonah Lehrer at The Frontal Cortex has the answer.

Posted by Alexa Harrington

If you’re a decent soul who sees your fellow humans as basically good until they prove themselves otherwise, then by all means, stick around. And watch this quick video from My Fellow American[link]; it illustrates the point that being a Muslim doesn’t make you an evil asshole, being an evil asshole makes you an evil asshole.

Posted by Alexa Harrington

Pennsylvania public schools have jumped on the cheating bandwagon. I’m excited to find out which state will be found out next. And I’m super duper excited to read American History a few decades from now when someone theorizes that President Bush and his No Child Left Behind Act pushed American educators to cheat on standardized tests.

Further Reading:

Atlanta Cheats, Too
Too Many Erasures On D.C. Standardized Tests
It’s Not On the Test
No Child Left Behind Is Ruining Our Education System

Posted by Alexa Harrington

(scantron)

Dear State and Federal Governments,

You don’t pay educators enough money. Perhaps a budget increase could class things up a bit in the U.S. Public School System. Get on that, please, for the love of all things wholesome and holy. Thanks!

Sincerely,
Alexa

P.S. Try not to be such tools.

Posted by Alexa Harrington

(meth pipe)

Remember the jackass educators in Washington D.C. who erased students’ incorrect answer bubbles and filled in the correct ones? So classy, so honest, such role models for the impressionable young minds they’re wearing down to nubs with high-pressure standardized tests. Adults suck. Need more fact-age to prove me right? Atlanta educators are slimy too:

Investigation into APS cheating finds unethical behavior across every level

America’s biggest teacher and principal cheating scandal unfolds in Atlanta

Report on Atlanta school cheating inquiry validates AJC analysis

Deal: APS cheating investigation outlines ‘dark chapter’ in system’s history

Atlanta school kids angry over cheating scandal

High-Stakes Testing & the Culture of Fear: The Atlanta Case, Report #1

Why Were Test Answer Sheets Altered? The Atlanta Case, Report #2

Atlanta Public Schools cheating: Some teachers admit guilt

Posted by Alexa Harrington

(Atlanta school bus)